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Date: Thu, 20 Nov 1997 10:01:21 +1100To: studio@toysatellite.org From: Don Pattenden <dpattenden@pegasus.com.au> Subject: Sad News Hello, I'm sorry to tell you that my sister Heather passed away last Wednesday (November 12) at around 1:30 PM. She was just 50 (her 50th birthday was on October 20). The end when it came was very peacefull; she gave a little sigh, but was in no pain and not showing any signs of distress. I was not actually with her at that moment (I arrived 15 minutes later) but two of her closest friends were at her bedside and I had been with her on a daily basis for the previous week (since arriving in Sydney). The Hospice where Heather spent her final days (the Hospice of the Sacred Heart) was wonderful. Even though it's located near Taylor's Square in one of the busiest areas of Sydney, it has an atmosphere of tranquility that hits you as soon as you step out of the lift, so that the hustle and bustle of the world outside is totally forgotten. The staff there are just marvellous -- they did everything they could to make Heather comfortable in every way possible, even to tiny details. Heather had many visitors at the Hospice, not surprising I guess since she had many, many friends, not to mention family of course. On the family side the most important visitor was her daughter Alison who had flown over from London just as soon as she heard about the deterioration in Heather's condition. You've probably heard the story of how Heather met her only daughter (taken from her at birth to be adopted out) for the first time only a year ago. What an amazing story; a real fairy tale! And Alison was there at Heather's bedside for those final days. Heather's sisters Carol and Laurel were there too; Carol flew up from Melbourne and Laurel fro The Rock (near Wagga Wagga). In fact we calculated that it was the first time in something like 33 years that the four of us, the four siblings, Carol, Laurel, Heather and I had been in the same room together. Just the way things have worked out over the years. The funeral was last Friday (November 14) at the Northern Suburbs Crematorium. It was very well attended (150 odd) in itself a demostration of the wide circle of friends Heather had built up over the years. I delivered the eulogy. It's not very often that I volunteer for public speaking but in this case it was only fitting since Heather and I had always been close since she was a tiny tot. It was a simple but tasteful service, with some of Heather's favourite music, mcu as we thought she might have wished it, never having been one for popm and ceremony. It was a very intensely emotional experience for everybody involved, but the ceremony was in itself something of a catharsis, a realease, a resolution of sorts. And when we all gathered afterwards at one of the local RSL clubs there was a feeling of enormous closeness between us, all Heather's friends and relatives. We all felt as if we were joined by a common bond. And this even though some of us were meeting for the first time. Well, I suppose I had better explain how it is I come to be in Sydney, when the last time you heard from me I was in Murwillumbah, heading north, looking forward to arriving in Brisbane. I did make it to Brisbane, you'll be pleased to learn and I have quite a lot to tell you about that final leg of the Sydney-Brisbane journey. But that will have to wait until things settle down again and I can collect my thoughts. I'll be sending out an Onroad Newsletter in due course. When Heather arrived back in Sydney again after her own "round Australia" journey had been cut short on medical advice it soon became clear that she was deteriorating much faster than anyone had realised. It was soon obvious that she would need constant care and it was at that stage she was booked into the Hospice. Meanwhile I was getting closer and closer to Brisbane, and realising that just as soon as I arrived there I would have to make arrangements to travel to Sydney as a matter of urgency. Fortuneately I had a contact in Brisbane, so I had somewhere to leave my bike, tent & camping gear. But I did actually make it to the centre of Brisbane by pedal power before departing. That gave me a great deal of satisfaction; all the way from Melbourne to Brisbane by my own efforts - every inch of the way. Sorry if my prose isn't up to scratch. It has been a bit of a struggle typing this. Words just aren't flowing. But the past couple of weeks have been enormously taxing. Hopefully my articulacy will be restored by the time I make arrangements to send out my Newsletter. Don. PS Alexis - wonderful to hear from you. No time to reply but will write just as I get the chance. |